With Bob our faithful 1990 OneTen packed, we set off from Leeds, heading down to Portsmouth on Saturday 30^th May for our month of adventure. Rich did a full service before we left so we knew something would inevitably go wrong as that’s how Land Rovers roll. As we drove south in glorious sunshine, Rich wound down the window and as we pulled into the services. As we parked up, the window would not wind up – and so it starts we thought. Rich promptly produced a spare winder/plastic thingy to fix the window winder, and in no time at all it was resolved. Result.

Feeling a tad smug, we continued on our way down to Portsmouth and managed to squeeze Bob on the drive of our B&B. Meeting up with a friend, we went to the maritime museum to visit the Mary Rose, HMS Victory and HMS Warrior, all of which are worth a visit if you are in the area.

We were catching the evening sailing to Bilbao, so we set off to the ferry terminal at 8pm. We were so excited to check out the ferry we would be spending the next 33 hours on. Once on board we walked up the stairs with a cool box and enough food for a week and the shop was exactly where it is on the Liverpool – Belfast ferry. It became clear that we didn’t need to explore the ferry as it was identical to the Belfast ferry. Slightly deflated we found our cabin and found an invite to go on the bridge tomorrow. The following day we got a tour round the bridge with another couple. Brittany Ferries work with a dolphin and whale charity to protect marine wildlife from the shipping industry and we attend the conservation talk and that evening spent a fantastic hour watching a pod of over 30 dolphins pass in front of us. As we headed back to our cabin, we heard “Could Mr Trusson please come to guest services”. Like many older people, Bob had leaked. There was a wee puddle of diesel but as there was nothing to soak it up, it looked substantial. Puppy pads placed under her solved the issue and the engineer was happy. Diesel leakages would become a familiar re-occurrence.

Below – Portsmouth in the evening – From our Ferry.

We arrived in a rain-soaked Spain and it felt more like Belfast than Bilbao with gusty wind driven squalls. We set off north and the windscreen wiper started to make an ominous clunking sound, then the noise stopped as the wiper flopped onto the bonnet. Being on the dual carriage way, there was nowhere to stop. I yelled “hold her steady” as I wound down the window (still working thanks to Rich) and in a move James Bond would be proud off, I swung out in the pouring rain and grabbed the wiper. We took the next turn off and Rich secured it back and tightened the other one, just in case. As issues come in threes, we crossed our fingers and headed on.

We took the mountain road to St Etienne de Baigorry into France and camped at St Jean Pied du Port. The next day we set off and the sat nav looked as if a small child had gone crazy with a crayon! Bob coped well with the steep narrow mountain roads, and we took our time weaving through the Western Pyrenees, stopping to do some hiking.

Above left and Right – Is there a better way to live your Land Rover Life than camping and hiking?

We set off again in Bob, who was making a worrying noise by the time we arrived in Torla. Rich discovered that the alternator was making a bid for freedom. We spoke to the lovely receptionist at the camp site and she suggested a garage, luckily on our route back to France. The next morning, we got up bright and early to discover that Rich’s new shorts had been nicked. In all our travels, we have never had anything stolen from a campsite.

Below – Tarla in Spain looked resplendant!

Luckily for us, I undertook Spanish lessons before this trip and I specifically learnt a new phrase “Tienes esto para reparar mi alternador por favor?” Or “Do you have anything to fix my alternator” in English, which worked as we got the correct sized bolts to secure it.

Alternator secured, we hoped that was our third piece of bad luck and the last. We trundled up the col du Tourmalet, Col d’Aspin and Col de Peyresoude in the Landie and on the gravel bikes. I descended quicker on the bike! We clocked up our third country as we crossed through Andorra on our way to Carcassonne. The castle in Carcassonne is amazing and worth a visit. Bob managed the 38 degree heat better than Rich and me. We stopped at Plages Valars to dip our toes in the Med, before carrying onto Alpe d’Huez.

Below – Bob enjoying the view at Brèche de Roland

We camped at Le Bourg D’Oisans before cycling up Alpe d’Huez, only to be passed by a group of runners! The shame! They were elite French Army runners which did dull the humiliation somewhat. As we had ticked off the major French climbs, we headed to Northern Italy and the Stelvio. We met our good friend Mathias in Bormio, a small mediaeval town that was developed before cars were invented. This meant that Bob just squeezed through the narrow streets. Parking was so rare that when we got a space outside our accommodation, we did not dare move Bob.

The Stelvio did not disappoint, and we felt smug to arrive at the summit on our bikes as motor cyclists high fived each other for getting up it. Try it without an engine mate!

Below – The infamous Stelvio pass, great on a Motorbike, hard work on a push bike!

As France was experiencing over 40 degrees, we left Bormio at 2:30am to beat the intense heat and to get to Ypres to stay with Mathias. Mathias had specially done up his guest room for us and his parents had filled his fridge with my favourite Kriek beer. Just what I needed after the long drive! We arrived in Switzerland as the sun rose behind the mountains. We paused to buy chocolate before arriving back in France.

Below – Switzerland at dawn

On the drive home, we only stopped to swap drivers and attend calls of nature. By this point, we are literally in the middle of France, about an hour from Metz. Rich filled Bob with diesel, and I hopped in for my turn to drive. I pulled away from the pump and Bob stalled. Rich gave me a dirty look for abusing his beloved Landie. As politely as I muster, I suggested he drive as it was not my driving but a problem with Bob. He tried to drive off and the power had completely died. We thought she had just got too hot and we waited and she seemed to be back to normal. Twenty minutes later, Rich said he was losing power and we crawled into the Aire. Mathias had rejoined us and we waited an hour in 40 degree heat with no shade for Bob or ourselves.

After an hour we set off again to get somewhere in the shade but Bob was having none of it. We stopped on the slip road and phoned our European cover. After half an hour going over and over the car details, Rich received the words “We can’t help you, phone the police”. Stunned he asked her, why he had taken out European cover if they couldn’t help. She explained that we need to be recovered by the police, first. We rang the police and a tow truck turned up in 20 minutes. Mathias said he would follow us but the driver explained that he had a secret key. The tow truck turned off the motorway, the driver opened a gate and our magical mystery tour began!

Above – A familiar sight for those that drive the older Land Rover

We arrived at a garage that was not too happy to see us and explained that they do not fix broken down cars. As Bob was unloaded, the driver pointed out a diesel leakage. We phoned the recovery again and handed the phone over to the garage receptionist. You don’t need to speak French to work out that the receptionist did not think much of the person handling our recovery. Payment and storage was agreed. As all of this was going on, Rich and Mathias went to look at Bob and discovered that the fuel lift pump had failed. An easy fix but it was Thursday evening and we would not get the part before Monday. Our ferry from Rotterdam was Saturday evening. We made the call to leave Bob as we had taken a month off work, I could not ring in on Monday and say I was not coming in!

We grabbed what we hoped were the essentials – our overnight bags and my clothes bag with cycling gear, so I could commute to work. We thanked Mathias for staying with us and encouraged him to go to go home which took another 5 hours’ drive. We had a tense wait for the taxi as the garage had shut and it was still 40 degrees. The taxi arrived and we got to our hotel. We phoned about onward travel, and we reassured we would receive an email or text. Next morning we woke and there was no message. Phoned again and were told they could not find a hire car. They said they would keep trying. Finally got a hire car in Metz, a 40 minutes taxi ride away and were informed that they would not pay for the taxi as we had a hire car. (They did reimburse us for this in the end). There was no public transport as we had missed the 9am bus from the arse hole of nowhere to Metz!

We were happy to be moving so picked up the hire car to be told we could not go to Rotterdam and had to buy tickets to Dover from Calais, that they would pay for. Finally got to Calais to see a boat leaving so more hanging about. As we got on the ferry we watched in horror as 5 coach loads of English school children also boarded the ferry. I did not think I was a violent person until I was enclosed with 200 feral children full of energy drinks and Haribo!

We finally made it to Dover to be told that the recovery company could not get a hire car that night and we would have to stay in Dover. At this point we just wanted home and we said we would book the hire car and they could reimburse us. We finally got home 44 hours after we broke down. It was a stressful end to what had been an amazing trip. This is not a rant about the recovery service; most of the staff were brilliant. It is that not one person handles the recovery so there is no continuity. We got all our expenses back and Bob arrived home three and a half weeks later with all our camping, and cycling gear and duty free.

It was an amazing road trip of 1,986 miles and the 110 station wagon was the perfect vehicle, if only she had aircon! Yes, we will travel everywhere with a spare fuel lift pump and an assortment of bolts in future and we will continue to do crazy road trips in Bob!